View Full Version : overcome being shy and unconfident

28-12-08, 05:19
I have friends, but it normally takes ages for me to make some. I don't seem to tyalk ato people much. I don't know what to talk about and I'm really shy. I just want to make more friends much easily.

Captain Haribo
03-05-09, 03:51
Just be yourself! Strike up a conversation with one of your friends, such as "how was your weekend?" people love to talk about themselves and it will show that you're nice and care about your friends. Find a common interest such as a sports, girls, anything you think the other person might be interested in too.

With all due respect, I don't think this is great advice.

Having suffered from shyness when I was younger I can say "just be yourself" was just an annoying cliche. I think the main problem was that my shyness stemmed from insecurity and not really knowing who "myself" was. It's difficult to find a common interest with people when you're not entirely sure what your own interests are!

I agree, though, that asking questions and having other people is the easiest way to "come out of your shell". Some people like to talk about themselves more than others - I still hate talking about myself despite being a lot more charismatic than I once was - and will probably relish the opportunity. These people obviously make great friends for shy people as they can do all the talking!!

15-12-10, 23:36
Yeah this is a tough issue. I have a brother that's very shy. He seems content though. I would suggest self exploration. Try some meditation. Try to examine what you are feeling insecure about when you experience nervousness. I know it's hard to self analyze in a nerve racking situation but do your best to reflect on what's making you feel uncomfortable. Then work on it.
I'm so sick of writing term paper (http://www.oppapers.com/)s. I can't wait 'til Christmas break.

07-01-11, 03:58
i totally agree with captain haribo...cuz such friends dont actually pay much attention to wat ure saying, so u can freely talk in front of them. this boosts up your courage. try to participate more in your classroom so that everyone knows you exist. i had/have the same problem but im gradually overcoming it now in my uni life. i hope these advices help u.

04-03-11, 17:06
Often it is just the first step, once you open up a conversation with some things just flow from there. Getting drunk helps you lower your inhibitions too, but I wouldn't recommend doing that too much!!

13-04-11, 09:41
I think, the best thing is you should have sense of humor, by which you can go in in innnn deep with conversation without thinking

27-07-11, 16:08
yes i think so too, just smile and laugh. I think a lot of people assume uni will be completely different to school, and in my experience it really wasnt, people were just as bitchy and unfriendly as when they were 14, but hey! Joining clubs and societies is a good way too, cos then you have something to talk about and they often have icebreakers at the beginning of the year. I think the beginning of your first year you have to get stuck in cos in my experience people stick to those they knew then, and only get together a little bit more after.

26-02-12, 21:27
The flower that smells the sweetest is shy and lowly (http://sites.google.com/site/whatdogirlslike1/do-girls-like-shy-guys).:o: